


Snapped

by orphan_account



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Gen, Language, mild violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-14
Updated: 2018-12-14
Packaged: 2019-09-18 04:49:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,692
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16988340
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Lucifer is mad at Chuck, Chuck is staying silent, Dean is shouting insults, and Lucifer is slinging them back.  It is enough to make anyone crack.  And when you do, it takes everyone by surprise. It also makes you the go between for Lucifer and…everything else.





	1. Chapter 1

Wow…This was happening.  You sat back in your chair as Sam, Dean, God, and Lucifer (in Cas’ body, because that isn’t confusing) sat and argued.  You sip your hot tea, holding it in your hands as a life line.  This debate, if you would call it that, was getting pretty heated.  And to be honest, you had no idea what the hell was going on. 

 

You only joined this little hunting party about six months ago.  You ran into the Winchesters on a case and after that, they let you stay at the bunker with them.  They filled you in on all the crazy things that were going on behind the scenes, even behind the scenes of normal hunting, and you decided to help them out.  To be honest, you even did some research outside of what they told you to try to get the full story.

 

You were a good hunter, been hunting since you were fifteen, so your added experience and knowledge was very beneficial to the boys.  The problem is…no amount of experience prepares you for an all-out verbal war between two hunters, an archangel, and God himself. 

 

To be honest, you weren’t sure you even knew what they were arguing about anymore.  Each side (Dean, Sam, and Chuck versus Lucifer) were merely sending insults at this point.

 

“Listen to me, you useless knuckle dragging meat suit…”  Lucifer shot at Dean.

 

“Oh, keep talking, Satan, and I’ll deep fry your wings in holy oil!”  Dean shouted back.

 

Having had enough, you set your mug down and walked over.  It was clear that this conversation was going nowhere and their insults were helping any.

 

“Just like your father, aren’t you Dean?  Close-minded, condescending-  OW!”  Lucifer yelled as you grabbed the corner of his ear and yanked down on it, pulling him alongside you.

 

“You…sit”  You pointed at Chuck, Sam, and Dean.  “You…come with me.”  You said to Lucifer, pulling him along by his ear, him shouting profanities at you as you went.  Honestly, you were surprised he hadn’t broken free of you yet, he had the power to…

 

You moved quickly, dragging him into your room before pushing him down onto your bed.  “This has to stop!”  You shouted at him, going to shut the door.  Not even a small part of your brain stopped to realize that you just manhandled the most powerful angel in existence into submission so you could yell at him.

 

“How dare you!  I should-.”

 

“Finish that sentence and I will personally run you through with an archangel blade.”  You yelled back at him.

 

He stood up, but you were quick to walk over and shove him back down on the bed.  “You wouldn’t, you need me to defeat the darkness.”  His tone was filled with arrogance, only fueling your anger even more.

 

“No, Lucifer.  We don’t need you.  Would you make this a little easier, yes, but we could still do this without you, don’t think we couldn’t for a moment!”  You shouted back at him, screaming into his face.  “You are hear out of the goodness of Sam and Dean’s heart and because Chuck wants you to be!  So why don’t you stop acting like a petulant child, slinging insults, and listen for five damned minutes.  Because…You’re one insult away from starting a war.”  You shot him a look, that if could kill, would have left him in pieces all over you wall.  He just glared at you in response, both of you squaring off in a silent staring match. 

 

You were the one to break first, giving a deep sigh, leaving him with a victorious smirk.  You knew yelling at him wasn’t going to do anything, so you got a hold of your temper and spoke softly.  “Listen, I get it…”  You moved over and sat down next to him, hands in your lap.  “Chuck did a lot to you, you have earned an apology…” 

 

“I have earned more than an apology!”  He shouted. “Do you know what he did to me?  Why I was cast out?”  He glared at you, an almost murderous look in his eyes.

 

“Yes, I do.  That’s why I say you have earned an apology.  But you aren’t guiltless in this either!  You could have chosen a different path, but you didn’t.  That’s why you are here now.” 

 

He pouted as he turned his head away from you, looking at the other wall.  Well, he clearly didn’t like what you just said, but damn it, he needed to hear it. 

 

“But that’s kinda my point.”  After a few moments, you could feel the bed move as he turned to face you.  “You have a choice.  Either you do what you’ve been doing and lose everything.”  You turned to face him, looking up into the blue eyes that you knew as Cas, but weren’t really Cas’ anymore.  “Or you can listen, be the bigger man…er, angel.  And maybe make a few allies, maybe even a couple friends.” 

 

Lucifer stared down at you, his jaw clenching as he thought over your words.  You sat in silence, looking up at him, until he turned his head away, looking down at the ground.  “I’m not saying you have to change who you are, but you have to change your attitude.”  You gave a big sigh before patting him on the shoulder.  “Just think about it.” 

 

You stood up and walked over to the door.  Did you really just have that conversation with Lucifer?  “Make yourself comfortable.”  You said over your shoulder, not making any eye contact with him.  “This is my room, so no one will walk in without your say so, I’ll make sure of that.” 

 

With those words you closed the door and went back into the war room.  You paused for a few minutes to try to collect yourself before talking with the other guys.  Your temper was running short and you hoped they didn’t set it off, but you really should have known better than to hope that.  Sam was talking with Chuck as Dean sat in his seat, arms crossed, still fuming over the words Lucifer said before you intervened. 

 

“Where is the dick bag?”  Dean grunted out.

 

“Enough!”  You screamed at him as you snapped.  He visibly jumped in his seat, shocked to see you, the normally laid back hunter, now yelling at him.  “He said bad things, you said bad things, you’re both fucking pretty, get over it!”  You crossed your arms over your chest as you glared down at him.  “Or do I need to manhandle you to your room like I did with Lucifer?”

 

Dean was quick to hold up his hands in surrender, shaking his head.  “Nope…we’re good.” 

 

“Good.”  You took a few steps and stepped up to Chuck.  You yelled at the Devil, and your best friend, might as well add God to the list.  “And you!”  You shouted as you pulled on the back of Chuck’s chair, moving him away from the table.  You stepped in front of him, so he had no choice but to look at you.  “You owe him an apology.  That’s all he wants, a fucking apology.  And so help me G-… you…you will give it to him.  It’s the least you can do for your SON!” 

 

You heard Sam and Dean give some whispered words along the lines of ‘holy crap’, but you didn’t care.  You were running on adrenaline.  You were tired of the fighting, tired of everyone pointing fingers.  Everyone, hell even you, had a hand in making this mess, and it was going to take everyone to deal with it.  “So…”  You said, still glaring at Chuck.  “When he is done cooling down and comes out here, you are going to put your big girl panties, look him in the eye, and fucking apologize for casting him out.  Because if I know my lore…”  You looked over to the boys for some backup.  “And I know my lore…”  They nodded in response as you turned back to chuck.  “It wasn’t a hundred percent Lucifer’s fault he fell, was it?” 

 

Chuck lowered his head.  You could see the hurt in his eyes, he clearly felt some guilt and shame when it came to Lucifer.  You heard him defend the angel to the boys earlier, telling them that he wasn’t a bad guy, so you knew a part of him wanted to do by right by Lucifer.  Well, here was his chance. 

 

You heard someone clear their throat in the doorway.  Looking up, you saw Lucifer standing there, looking at you with a strange look in his eyes.  “Well, here we go…”  You moved quickly, grabbing two chairs to the walkway below the stairs, facing them towards each other.  You looked up and pointed at Lucifer, then to the chair.  No words were needed, he followed your direction and sat where he was assigned.  You waited for him to sit before giving him a small smile and nod.  You were actually kind of proud that Lucifer was willing to make peace.  You gave his shoulder a small squeeze of encouragement before turning to look at chuck. 

 

“So…gonna wiggle on those big girl panties or do I have to put them on for you?” 

 

Dean barked out a quick laugh, but began fake coughing to cover it up after Chuck sent him a look.  Sam was quick to kick his brother under the table before giving you a nod.  It didn’t seem like much, but that confirmation was what you needed.  He made it clear that you were doing the right thing. 

 

After a couple more moments, Chuck got up and made his way over to the second chair, slowly sitting.  “Alright, we’re going to give you guys some time.  Just…be open, be honest…and try not to break anything?” 

 

You moved to step over to the boys, signaling over your shoulder.  Sam was quick to follow your lead, but Dean stayed rooted where he was.  “Dean?”  You hissed at him. 

 

“Oh, I’m not missin’ this.”  He said as he settled into his chair.

 

The stress from the day build up inside you and snapped again.  “Dean Winchester!  So help me God!”  You reached out and grabbed his ear, just like you did with Lucifer earlier, and drug him out of the room as he yelped in pain. 

 

Chuck and Lucifer watched the exchange, staying silent until the hunters were out of the room.  “Looks like you made a new friend…”  Chuck said, looking to his son.  He watched as a soft smile spread across Lucifer’s face, lighting his eyes up a little.  It was a sight he hadn’t seen in a long time. 

 

“So it does…”  Lucifer watched the door you left from, a little shocked that his first ‘friend’ was a human, one of the creatures he hated the most.  But then again, they weren’t all that bad.  He gave a small smirk before turning back to his father, ready to, as you put it, be the bigger man. 


	2. Chapter 2

You found yourself sitting in the kitchen as you stared between the two archangels.  Sam and Dean sat next to you, doing the same damn thing.  When Chuck said he was bringing Gabriel back, you had all been a bit on edge.  The boys remembered the pranks he used to pull, and you…well you read the books, so you knew about it as well. 

 

But that wasn’t what made it uncomfortable.  What was uncomfortable was the glare/stare that was being shared between Gabriel and Lucifer.  Not only was it filled with tension, since Lucifer killed him, but it was also filled with a bit of relief.  But that was the problem, you didn’t know for sure, because they had stood there in silence for the last…you checked the clock, fifteen minutes.  Seriously?

 

You cleared your throat, capturing Lucifer’s attention as you made a motion to Gabriel and mouthed ‘Talk’ to him.  He let out a sigh as he turned back to Gabriel as he opened his mouth.

 

“Brother…I am-.”

 

“Screw you!”  Gabriel spoke quickly before he shoved past Lucifer and took off to his room. 

 

You let out a deflated sigh as you got up and looked to the boys for help, but they just shifted their eyes down and scuffled off through the door.  _Thanks guys_.

 

“He hates me.”  Lucifer said sadly as his shoulders shifted forward and sagged.

 

You got up and walked over to him, putting a comforting hand on his shoulder.  “I doubt that, Lucifer.  He is your brother.”

 

“I killed him!”  He shouted, suddenly letting his emotions run wild.  You could see the anger, but also the hurt and shame in his eyes. “He should hate me!”

 

“And if I heard the story right…he would have killed you.”  You took Lucifer’s hand and led him over to the table and sat him down in one of the chairs.  “Just…stay here and cool off, okay?”

 

He nodded before you turned and walked away.  You weren’t sure when you became the family counselor for the host of heaven, but between the session with Chuck and Lucifer and now Lucifer and Gabriel, the title seemed to fit.  Maybe you were just Lucifer’s counselor?

 

It took you a little while to find Gabriel.  He had holed up in the dungeon, snapping some candies into existence, wallowing in his anger. 

 

“Can we talk?”  You asked with a little knock on the door, looking at Gabriel as he shot you a glare. 

 

“Oh, if it isn’t my brother’s little pet!”  He said with a bite to his voice.

 

You wanted so much to go up there and slap the face off of him, he had nothing but sarcastic comments since he came back…but you figured you would give him that one.  He was angry, he was stressed, give him that one…

 

“I want to talk to you about Lucifer.”  You said as you walked in and sat next to him.  “I know you are upset.  He killed you.  But to be honest, weren’t you going to do the same thing?” 

 

“You know what peaches, I don’t know why you are involved in this!”  He said angrily. 

 

“I am involved because I just saw your brother’s heart break when he tried to apologize and you told him to screw himself…”  You said with some anger in your voice.  You knew that Gabriel had a point to be angry, but so did Lucifer.

 

Gabriel glared at you as he snapped his fingers and another piece of candy appeared.  “You need to talk to him.  He just wants to talk, to apologizes for-.”

 

“Who are you to talk on his behalf?”  He said with pure hellfire in his eyes.  “What, are you screwing him?  Is that it?” 

 

“NO!”  You screamed quickly.  You tried to get your emotions under control.  You already had two emotional archangels, adding you to the mix wouldn’t end well for anyone.  “I’m just trying to help you two make peace.”  You gritted out as you sighed.

 

“Yea, sure.  Sex must be pretty good for you to come to his defense.” 

 

Your anger spiked before you could control it, and your body moved on its own.  You stood and swung your hand as fast and hard as you could, letting it connect with the side of his face, echoing a loud slap around the room, followed by your cry in pain as you clutched your broken hand to your chest. 

 

You stumbled back as Gabriel reeled from your slap.  He stared at you in shock as you held your hand and glared at him, letting him have it.

 

“You are such a douche!  He feels nothing but guilt over that night!  You were the one who stepped up, you were the one who started the fight, you were the one who tried to kill him first!”  You screamed at him as tears welled in your eyes.  Half from your anger, the other half from the pain of your shattered bones.  “How dare you talk about him like he was the only one in the wrong, you fucking ass!  You know, when Chuck said he was bringing you back, the boys warned me you would be an asshole, but I gave you a damn chance.  But you know what, I agree with them.  You are nothing but a spoiled, stuck up, asshole!  Screw you!”  You screamed as you turned and stormed from the room and made your way back to the kitchen. 

 

Your vision was actually getting a little blurry from the tears stinging your eyes as you turned in.  Luckily, it was only Lucifer in there, as you figured the boys would have killed Gabriel had they seen the state of your hand. 

 

“Lucifer?  Could you help?”  Your voice was weak as you held out your hand, the bruises already forming as it was already swollen.

 

“What happened?!”  He shouted as he got up and made his way over to you, quickly healing your hand until the pain was gone. His hands were gentle as he moved your hand to heal and examine it.  It was always strange to have Lucifer heal your wounds, his grace was different from Castiel’s, it was cooler.  But you liked it.

 

You sighed as you flexed your hand and rubbed it.  “Thank you.” 

 

“What happened?”  He asked again, more in control of his emotions this time. 

 

“Well…”

 

“She slapped me.”  Gabriel spoke from the door, a look of surprise on his face after seeing his brother heal your hand. That was actually why he followed after you, because he knew he needed to fix the damage.  He was being an ass to you, for no reason other than to vent his anger, and he wanted to apologize to you, you were only trying to help.  But to see Lucifer care over a human, he realized that his brother had changed.

 

Lucifer looked up and glared at his brother before turning back to you.  “Are you hurt elsewhere?”  He looked over your body quickly before you shook your head.

 

“No, but I think I will give you time to talk.”  You looked to Gabriel as you sighed and went to step out of the kitchen.  But you stopped at the door and looked at Gabriel.  “Just hear him out…”  And then you moved out to the library where you were sure the boys were with a bottle of whiskey.  You needed a drink.

 

000

 

The boys had gone to bed hours ago.  It must have been three in the morning, but you couldn’t sleep. Your mind was wide awake and debating with itself.  It had been hours since you left Gabriel and Lucifer in the kitchen.  At first there were raised voices and the sounds of some pans flying around, but then there was silence, and that was how it had been for a while now.

 

Part of you wanted to just wait, give them time to work out their troubles.  But the other part of you wanted to go see…well, check…to make sure there wasn’t a dead archangel on the floor, making you send a call to Chuck.

 

You could always do a drive by situation, just walk past the kitchen, as if you were going to your room…but then you would be stuck in your room until morning…and if someone needed to talk…ugh.  Why did this have to be so complicated?!  Your mind screamed at you as you took another sip of your whiskey.

 

It was about an hour later that you finally heard footsteps coming up to the library.  Looking up, you saw Gabriel and Lucifer come around the corner, with a look of peace on their faces.  You smiled as you could tell from their body language that whatever was said in the kitchen seemed to fix the problem.  Gabriel was the first to step up to you as you rose from your chair. 

 

“I want to apologize, sugar…for what I said, and your hand.  You were only trying to help…and you did.  Thank you.”  Gabriel gave you a quick smile before he turned to his brother and gave him a look.  “I’m off to bed…”

 

“You don’t sleep.”  You deadpanned with a look. 

 

“Nope.  But the Winchester’s do!”  He said with an eyebrow wiggle and then he was gone. You should probably be worried about what he was doing, but you didn’t really care, as long as everything was at peace…for now.

 

You looked to Lucifer as he stared down at the floor before walking up to you.  “How are you doing?  Everything seems like it is okay now.” 

 

He didn’t speak, instead he stopped in front of you for a moment before pulling you into a tight hug, wrapping his cool arms around your body and tucking his head in against your neck. 

 

You froze for a moment, even stopped breathing, as you processed what was happening.  A hug.  You were getting a hug from Lucifer…the devil…okay…  You softly wrapped your arms up and around his shoulders, returning the embrace as you felt some of the tension leave his shoulders.

 

“Thank you.”  He mumbled softly against your shoulder. 

 

You smiled as you tightened your embrace.  “Anytime, sweetie.” 


	3. Chapter 3

“You’re shitting me, right?!” You screamed as the demons pushed you down to your knees and you looked up to see the smug expression of the demon you considered…well, you had considered…a friend.  “What the actual fuck, Crowley?!” 

 

“Hello, darling.  I hope the boys weren’t too rough with you.”  He didn’t miss a beat as he spoke and then followed it up with a little sip of his drink, looking down on you with an amused expression.

 

You glared at him as you reached down to your boot and pulled out the concealed blade you had hidden in there.  “I don’t know what you want, but you could have called like a civilized person!”  You screamed at him as you brought your blade up and cut the hand of the demon who still had your shoulder. 

 

The demon screeched as his skin bubbled and sizzled.  Thanks to your little ‘invention’ the blade forged in holy water.  “Back off, black eyes.  Before I gank your ass.”

 

“Now, now.”  Crowley said as he signaled to the demon to stand down.  “We don’t need theatrics.  You are under no threat here.” 

 

“No threat?!”  You gaped at him.  He couldn’t be serious.  “Your demons jumped me while I was on a supply run.  Gag me, threaten me, and then throw me in this hell hole?  No offense, but I feel very fucking threatened!”  You began to storm about the room, but the only exit you could see was behind Crowley.  “Move.”  You growled at him as you stood up into his face.

 

“Sorry, darling.  I need you here.”

 

“Why?”

 

“Leverage.” 

 

You stopped for a moment, replayed the word, and then froze again.  “Leverage on who?!”  You shouted as you gave him a shove.

 

Crowley didn’t seem phased, only a little annoyed at your behavior.  “Lucifer.  It is no secret you’re his favorite.  Where you go, he will follow.  As I said, leverage.” 

 

Your blood ran cold as you realized you were bait for Lucifer.  “You cruel, stuck up, son of a bitch.  Are you kidding me?!” 

 

“No.  Now, sit down, shut up, and play nice.  Do that, and no harm will come to you.”

 

000

 

Four.  That is the number of times Crowley could handle you singing ‘Angels’.  Two.  The number of demons you had managed to gank before Crowley had to step in and use his powers to subdue you.  Six.  The number of demons you had trapped in your hand carved devil traps.  You carved them as a way to pass the time.  But after the first two got stuck, it was a personal goal of yours to hit double digits.  And that was just the first day.

 

You had been imprisoned by Crowley for three days now.  Well, imprisoned was a strong word for it.  Crowley kept his word, and never harmed you.  You knew he wouldn’t.  You and him had a friendship of sorts, but now you were useful and he doing this…  He made sure you were fed, had comfortable clothes and living arrangements as you waited for Lucifer to track you down. 

 

Honestly, you were a little offended it had taken him this long.  Granted, you did have those enochian warding symbols on your ribs, so maybe that was it.  You sighed as you got up that third day, determined to make Crowley break. 

 

If he was going to be an asshole and kidnap you, then you were going to make him regret it.  The stats for your first day were impressive.  The stats for the second one was pretty amazing as well.  Three exorcised demons. Two broken windows, which doesn’t sound all that impressive, but considering that your room didn’t have any, it made you proud.  And one released hell hound. 

 

Time to up your game for day three…

 

000

 

Crowley sat in the other room as he ran his fingers around his temple.  What the bloody hell was taking so long!  He expected Lucifer to be here that first day, ready to get his favorite little human back, but that hadn’t happened.  Instead, he was forced to endure the grueling torture of dealing with you and your pissy mood.  You had screamed, shouted, sang, caused mischief.  He was at his breaking point.

 

His original plan was to set up a trap for Lucifer.  There were still a few demons who were loyal to him…but now those ranks had dwindled after you got your hands on them.  Bollox, did he even have enough demons for his plan anymore?

 

Crowley was so deep into his own calculations that he hadn’t even noticed the drop in temperature as Lucifer landed in the building.  He glared at the demon.  He went to step forward, to smite him where he stood for having the audacity to take his only friend as hostage, but then he froze when he heard the screams of a demon. 

 

Crowley’s head snapped around at the sound, and that was when he noticed Lucifer.  “Bloody hell.  Why isn’t anyone doing their-.”

 

A demon burst through the doors, running in as he screamed, on fire.  Well…his shirt was.  A second one quickly followed, trying to put the fire out.  Crowley and Lucifer could only stand in silence as they looked between each other and the scene playing out.

 

“What the bloody hell happened?!”  Crowley bit out.  But he didn’t need an answer, he heard your laughter echo down the halls. 

 

You whistled ‘If I only had a brain’ as you walked down the hall and into the room, following the path the scorched demon took.  “Oh, hey, Lucifer!  Come to rescue me?”  You said cheerfully as you leaned against the door frame.  You looked over to the demons on the floor and then to Crowley and smiled evilly.  “Your move!” 

 

“Take her.”  Crowley said quickly, pointing to you.  “Take her, before I kill her.  I’ll try again when she’s in a better, more complaint, mood.”  Crowley walked over to the demon, hauling him off the floor and to his feet.  “Get out of my sight.”  He growled as you walked over to Lucifer.

 

“Are you hurt?”  He asked you quietly, looking you over with an amused smile on his face.

 

“Nope.  He wouldn’t ever hurt me, you know that.  Actually, it was kinda fun.  And that, was a masterpiece, if I do say so myself.”  You pointed to the singed demon as he walked by. 

 

Lucifer chuckled as he put an arm around your shoulders, flying you back to the bunker, where you would be safe and sound, without worry of Crowley’s antics.  No one saw Crowley for a while.  And when they finally did, two months later, his first question was , “Is Lucifer’s pet here, I don’t want to burst into flames?”

 

 


End file.
